The Ten Thousand Things

Joe: What we take to be a
self is tentative, fictitious,

constructed by clinging, temporary

identification with some
parts of experience.

Self arises, solidifying itself, like ice

floating in water.

Ice is actually made of the
same substance as water.

Identification

and clinging harden the water into ice.

In a similar way, we sense ourself as

separate.” t

This realization that the separate self is
an illusion must be one of the most useful

things I've ever learned.

I spent most of my life
I was a separate self-

contained unit and I felt
disconnected from those around me.

From the universe as a

whole.

But where exactly is
this seat of the self?

Where's the little Joe who's up there

in my head, directing everything?

Where is the seat of attention?

If I look for myself,

where do I find myself?

I find a constant flow of sense data,
sights, sounds, smells, temperature.

I find thoughts.

But who are these thoughts occurring to?

As Kornfield says, identification and
clinging harden the water into ice.

The

closest thing I can find to a
separate self is this contraction

in my chest that seems to

create some kind of
locus in time and space.

But actually I am in no way separate

from the flow.

This has been seen through
for me in meditation.

What I find in

meditation, if I have a good session,
is I drop into a much larger, possibly

infinite, ocean of awake awareness.

Which mostly has a fairly
neutral quality, but there's

actually a lovingness there.

A gentle sense of And I
find this encouraging to

say the least.

Of course, I have a social
self and I need to function.

And go to work and perform my

roles in society.

But there's no need to constantly reify
the separate self, this particle, somehow

split off from the rest of the universe.

What I actually find is an openness, a

sort of infinite openness, where I
used to imagine my separate self to be.

Jack Kornfield talks about ice and water.

heard it talked about in terms of a

wave.

A wave that somehow thinks
it's separate from the ocean.

Or a Sunbeam

that's forgotten it's part of the sun.

I'm a part of something
much bigger than I always

took myself to be.

But it's also something incredibly simple.

It's just the present

moment.

I'm not separate to
you who's reading this.

I really am just part of this flow.

I only care about this because I guess
I've always just wanted to know the truth.

I

guess I've always suffered feeling
so separate from things around me.

I's a great

relief when I realize and drop into the
fact that I'm this open, loving awareness.

And I

can then accept everything just exactly
the way it is in the present moment.

After all, what other
choice, do I really have?

What did we take to be yourself?

Is.

Start again.

What did we take to be itself?

Is the tentative fictitious.

Start again.

That we take to be yourself is tentative.

Fictitious.

Constructed by cleaning.

Uh, temporary identification
with some parts of experience.

Self arises, solidifying itself.

Like ice floating in water.

Ice is actually made of
the same substances water.

Identification in clinging
harden, the water into us.

In a similar way.

We sent ourselves as separate.

We sent ourself a separate.

That's Jack.

Kornfield the wise heart.

This revelation.

For me that.

The separate self.

Is an illusion.

Uh, persistent illusion that I've had.

My whole life until quite recently.

He's maybe the most important
thing I've ever learned.

And I learned it through experimentation.

Closing my eyes and looking
for the state of attention.

Looking for what's looking.

Is there a little.

Mini Joe.

Up there in my head.

Controlling labors.

I'm moving my body around.

And making me act in the world.

If I look to find myself my separate self.

Where exactly is it located?

I've seen other writers use this
metaphor of like ice in water.

I've also seen the metaphor of a wave.

In the ocean.

But our lady that imagined itself.

To be separate.

Or a bane of sunlight that plays itself
to be completely separate from the sun.

I take this to mean that.

There's only one entity.

And I'm a part of it.

And what I actually am
is an open awareness.

Experiencing a whole bunch of sense data.

In the present moment.

But what I'm not.

Is something separated off.

Somehow apart from.

From you, who's listening to this.

Well from anything else in the universe.

What I experienced.

In meditation.

Is that I am loving awareness.

I'm not on part of this
huge ocean of consciousness.

Which mostly has a pretty
neutral feel to it.

But there is a very subtle.

Well,

And there's a very subtle.

Kindness to this ocean of awareness.

Which I am.

That's a wonderful.

Thing to connect with.

And it's a great relief.

And this identification and clean.

That Jack Kornfield talks about
that hardens mortar into ice.

That's where most of my
pain in life comes from.

Well, I can feel.

I'm not chest.

It's like a little.

Hook.

That you could almost.

Hook something on to.

That is the seat of my.

Clinging clenching.

Contraction.

Which tells me it's a separate self.

And what I'm working on.

Is releasing that.

Letting go of that hook.

And just resting in open.

Awareness in the present moment.

And accepting things.

Exactly as they are.

Because what are the choice?

Do I really have.